The Eighth Week of Ordinary Time

 

Welcome to the Eighth week of Ordinary Time.

Please open your Hymnal to page 3 and join in our processional  “O Lord Please Don’t Burn Us” Verse 1

O LORD, please don’t burn us,   Don’t grill or toast your flock,

Don’t put us on the barbecue,  Or simmer us in stock,

Don’t braise or bake or boil us,  Or stir fry us in a wok. 

Thank you for that soothing recital it was good for my nerves after this week.  Now please open The Holy Text volume 1 to episode 7 page 85 where the prophets say …

 

American Voice	(very resonant) The Universe consists of a billion, billion galaxies... 77,000,000,000 miles across, and every galaxy is made up of a billion, zillion stars and around these stars circle a billion planets, and of all of these planets the greenest and the pleasantest is the planet Earth, in the system of Sol, in the Galaxy known as the Milky Way ... And it was to this world that creatures of an alien planet came ... to conquer and destroy the very heart of civilization...
	Mix into close-up of railway station sign: 'New Pudsey'. Pull out to mid-shot of a couple walking towards camera. They are middle-aged. He (Graham) wears a cricket blazer and grey flannels and a carrier bag. She (Eric) wears a fussy print dress.
American Voice	(gently) It was a day like any other and Mr and Mrs Samuel Brainsample were a perfectly ordinary couple, leading perfectly ordinary lives - the sort of people to whom nothing extraordinary ever happened, and not the kind of people to be the centre of one of the most astounding incidents in the history of mankind ... So let's forget about them and follow instead the destiny of this man ... (camera pans off them; they both look disappointed; camera picks up instead a smart little business man, in bowler, briefcase and pinstripes) ... Harold Potter, gardener, and tax official, first victim of Creatures from another Planet.
	Weird electronic music. Sinister atmosphere. Follow him out of station. Cut-away to flying saucer, over day skyline. Back to Potter as he walks up suburban road. Back to flying saucer. It bleeps as if it has seen its prey and changes direction. Cut back to Potter just about to open his front gate. Shot from over the other side of the road. Cut to flying saucer sending down ray. Potter freezes . . . shivers and turns into a Scotsman with kilt, and red beard. His hand jerks out in front of him and he spins round and scuttles up road in fast motion, to the accompaniment of bagpipe music. Cut to close-up of newspaper with banner headline: 'Man turns into a Scotsman'.
Newsvendor's Voice	Read all abaht it! Read all abaht it! Man turns into Scotsman!

Open your hymnal to page 15 and join us in singing “Yangtse Song”  Verse 1

We love the Yangtse,  Yangtse Kiang
Flowing from Yushu,  Down to Ching Kiang
Passing though Chung King,  Wuhan and Hoo Kow
3000 miles,,  But it gets there somehow
Oh! Szechuan's the province,  And Shanghai is the port
And Yangtse is the river,  That we all support

Now please open The Holy Text volume 2 to episode 32 page 122 where the prophets say …

(Close up on a sign saying 'Harley Street'. Stirring music. Mix through to interior of a smart, plush, ever so expensive Harley Street consulting room. The music swells and fades. Knocking at door, a short pause, then T.F. Gumby enters, backwards.)

T. F. Gumby: Doctor! Doctor! DOCTOR! (he goes up to the antique desk and bangs the bell violently; he smashes the intercom and generally breaks the desk up) Doctor! Doctor! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! Doctor! Doctor! Where is the Doctor?

(A pause. Then another door opens and another Gumby appears.)

Specialist: Hello!

T. F. Gumby: Are you the' brain specialist?

Specialist: Hello!

T. F. Gumby: Are you the brain specialist?

Specialist: No, no, I am not the brain specialist. No, no, I am not... Yes. Yes I am.

T. F. Gumby: My brain hurts!

Specialist: Well let's take a look at it, Mr. Gumby.

(Gumby specialist starts to pull up Gumby's sweater.)

T. F. Gumby: No, no, no, my brain in my head. (specialist thumps him on the head)

Specialist: It will have to come out.

T. F. Gumby: Out? Of my head?

Specialist: Yes! All the bits of it. Nurse! Nurse! (a nurse enters) Nurse, take Mr. Gumby to a brain surgeon.

 

Homily  Parishioners, it appears that the spill on effects of illegal immigration are starting to rear their ugly heads.  This development causes some to see reason, while other double down on their insanity.  We will start in Germany where some imbecile politico is defending immigrants “right” to loot stores (https://www.bild.de/regional/muenchen/muenchen-aktuell/regensburg-diebe-im-edeka-was-sie-im-supermarkt-klauten-86521154.bild.html).  Somehow the idea that this is happening in “Regensburg” seems appropriate. 

Meanwhile, up in ‘Canadabad’, the Bank of Canada has determined that “immigration” is driving up inflation, through housing prices (https://tnc.news/2023/12/09/immigration-inflation-boc/).  It seems that the “immigrants” with their government subsidies and “housing allowances” are willing to pay higher prices for homes thus furthering the effects of inflation.  “I am Shocked, SHOCKED I tell you”. 

Finally, right here in the U.S.A. it was admitted this week that our own Veterans Administration is having its funding siphoned off to provide health care for illegals (https://www.zerohedge.com/political/vas-role-illegal-immigrant-health-care-has-veterans-groups-and-legislators-arms).  The “Scummy Uncle Joe” administration has managed this by transferring funds from the VA to Homeland Security and then re routing those funds to illegals.  Apparently there are no depths too low for the “Democans” in the great replacement plans. 

Amen

Please join us in our recessional on page 3 of your hymnal “O Lord Please Don’t Burn Us” second verse. 

Oh Please don’t lightly poach us,  Or Baste us with hot fat,

Don’t fricassee or roast us,    Or boil us in a vat,

And please don’t stick thy servants, Lord,  In a Rotissomat.