The First Week Of Silly Time

 

Welcome to the First Week of “Silly Time”, The six week period between when the gifts of the prophets were bestowed upon Britain and when the same gifts were poured out upon the colonies.  This is a time of solemn introspection and reflection on our lives and their direction. 

Please open your Hymnal to page 3 and join in our processional  “O Lord Please Don’t Burn Us” Verse 1

O LORD, please don’t burn us,   Don’t grill or toast your flock,

Don’t put us on the barbecue,  Or simmer us in stock,

Don’t braise or bake or boil us,  Or stir fry us in a wok. 

Please open The Holy Text volume 1 to episode 13 page 168 where the prophets say …

Doctor   Mr Burtenshaw?

Man   Me, Doctor?

Doctor   No, me doctor, you Mr Burtenshaw. 

Man   My wife, Doctor?

Doctor   No.  Your wife patient, me Doctor.

Sister    Come this way please.

Man   Me, Sister?

Doctor   No. She Sister.  Me Doctor.  You Mr Burtenshaw. 

Nurse Doctor Walters? 

Doctor   Me, Nurse (to Sister)  You Mr Burtenshaw, (to man) She Sister, You Doctor. (to Nurse).

Nurse   No Doctor.

Doctor   No Doctor, Call ambulance.  Keep warm. 

Please open your hymnal to page 39 and join us in singing “A Medical Love Song” First verse. 

Inflammation of the foreskin reminds me of your smile,

I’ve had ballanital chancroids for quite a little while,

I gave my heart to NSU that lovely night in June,

I ache for you, my darling, and I hope you get well soon.

Please open the Holy Text volume 2 to episode 28 page 63 where the prophets uttered …

Alan  Well, last week we showed you how to become a gynaecologist, And this week on ‘How to do it’ we’re going to show you how to play the flute, how to split an atom, how to construct a box girder bridge, how to irrigate the Sahara Desert and make vast new areas of land cultivatable, but first, here’s Jackie to tell you how to rid the world of all known diseases.
Jackie   Hello,  Alan.
Alan   Hell, Jackie.
Jackie   Well, first of all become a doctor and discover a marvelous cure for something, and then, when the medical profession really starts to take notice of you, you can jolly well tell them what to do and make sure they get everything right so there’ll never be any diseases ever again.
Alan   Thanks, Jackie.  Great idea  ...

Homily  With the conclusion of the Democan National Convention I thought it appropriate to examine the current state of affairs in the Biden/Harris Administration.  I thought we would start in Kamala’s home, Oakland California.  If we see where she came from, we can get a goo idea where she would take us.  Recently Oakland harbor has been experiencing an interesting phenomenon – Piracy (https://abc7news.com/pirate-crime-crackdown-oakland-estuary-shows-progress-but-some-say-its-not-enough/14608052/)!  That is right, ships and boats in the Oakland estuary face constant attacks by ship born thieves, otherwise known as Pirates! 

To say that the Permawars launched by most of our recent presidents have NOT been successful would be an understatement.  However, a recent report by our own state department indicates a new low in our ongoing self inflicted losses.  It turns out that our primary surrogate in Syria is now using child Soldiers (https://www.state.gov/reports/2024-trafficking-in-persons-report/syria/)!  Obviously that one is going particularly poorly. 

Another international disaster has arisen from the incompetent removal of U.S. troops from Afghanistan.  Recently it came out that the Biden/Harris misadministration has failed to note the bogus nature of some non profits and gave them 239 million dollars.  Unfortunately, these bogus non profits were set up by Afghanistan’s Taliban government (https://www.judicialwatch.org/taliban-creates-fake-nonprofits/).  I have heard of buying off your enemies, but you can not buy them off if you do not know its them! 

Finally, a simple reading of the Biden/Harris Misadministration Party Platform shows that the Party plan is to give voting rights to the ten million plus Illegal immigrants that they have let into the country over the last few years (https://democrats.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/FINAL-MASTER-PLATFORM.pdf).  Please see pages 68-70 for the specific statement of intent.  So as an overview, they destroy what they run, Use the most heinous methods to try and stay in power, are utterly incompetent in day to day operations and lie about everything they are attempting.  Quite a group to have in charge of your country, with leaders like them who needs enemies! 

Amen

Please join us in our recessional on page 3 of your hymnal “O Lord Please Don’t Burn Us” second verse. 

Oh Please don’t lightly poach us,  Or Baste us with hot fat,

Don’t fricassee or roast us,    Or boil us in a vat,

And please don’t stick thy servants, Lord,  In a Rotissomat.