The Fifth Week of Extra Ordinary Time
Welcome to the
Fifth Week of Extra Ordinary Time.
Please
open your Hymnal to page 3 and join in our processional “O Lord
Please Don’t Burn Us” Verse 1
O LORD, please don’t burn us, Don’t grill or
toast your flock,
Don’t put us on the barbecue, Or simmer us in stock,
Don’t braise or bake or boil us, Or stir fry us in a
wok.
Thank you for
your spirited rendition, it literally made me "soar" to the
rostrum.
Please open
The Holy Text volume 1 to episode 4 page 44 where the prophets say …
|
Cut to
colonel: army recruitment posters on wall behind him. |
|
|
Colonel |
Right, cut
to me. As Officer Commanding the Regular Army's Advertising Division, I
object, in the strongest possible terms to this obvious reference to our own
slogan 'It's a dog's life... (correcting himself rapidly) a man's life
in the modern army' and I warn this programme that any recurrence of this
sloppy long-haired civilian plagiarism will be dealt with most severely.
Right, now on the command 'cut', the camera will cut to camera two, all
right, director... (cut to a man sitting at desk) Wait for
it! (cut back to colonel) Camera cut. (cut to man;
he has a Viking helmet on) |
It can be manly in
insurance, We'll up your premium semi-annually
It's all tax deductible, We're fairly incorruptible
We're sailing on the wide accountancy!
Oh, this is fun, Mr Cohen,
fetch me another exotic cheroot, Up, up, up your premium
Up, up, up your premium (Scribble away!), Up, up, up your premium
(And balance the books)
Now please open The Holy Text volume 2 to episode 45 page
334 where the prophets say …
|
Brigadier |
Dear Sir, I wish to protest in the strongest possible
terms. Yours sincerely, Brigadier N. F. Marwood-Git (retired). Read that
back, will you, Brian. |
|
Bishop |
And when he had built up Cedron, he sent Horsemen there,
and an host of footmen to the end that issuing out they might make outroads
upon the ways of Judea, as the King commanded them... |
|
Brigadier |
Good! Pop it in an envelope and bung it off! It's no good
bottling these things up, Brian. If you feel them you must say them or you'll
just go mad... |
|
Bishop |
Oh yes indeed ... as the book of Maccabee said ... Ye as
the flea is like unto an oxen, so is the privet hedge liken unto a botanist
black in thy sight, O Lord! |
|
Brigadier |
Quite... Look why don't you just nip out for lunch,
Brian... |
|
Bishop |
Yea ... as Raymond Chandler said, it was one of those days
when Los Angeles felt like a rock-hard fig. |
|
Brigadier |
Brian, let's stop this pretending, shall we. |
|
Bishop |
Oh... ye... as Dirk Bogarde said in his autobiography... |
|
Brigadier |
Brian... let's stop all this futile pretence... I've...
I've always been moderately fond of you... |
|
Bishop |
Well to be quite frank, Brigadier ... one can't walk so
closely with a chap like you for... for so long without... feeling something
deep down inside, even if it isn't anything... anything ... very much. |
|
Brigadier |
Well, splendid... Brian... er... well I don't suppose
there's much we can do, really. |
|
Bishop |
Not on television ... no... |
|
Brigadier |
No... they ... they are a lot more permissive these days
than they used to be... |
|
Bishop |
Ah yes... but not with this sort of thing... |
|
Brigadier |
No ... I suppose they've ... got to draw the line
somewhere... |
|
Bishop |
Yes... |
|
Brigadier |
Well take a letter, Brian. Dear Sir, I wish to protest... |
Homily Parishioners, I thought this a good week to
point out some positive news that is largely being bias/ignored by the MSM once
again. As they obfuscate, I will elucidate.
Lost in this weeks
largess of stories about “Orange man Bad” was an economic reality that all the
Economists either can not, or will not explain.
America experienced the second largest monthly cash surplus in recorded
history (https://www.fiscal.treasury.gov/files/reports-statements/mts/mts0425.pdf)! With all the gloom and doom on how terrible
the tariffs will be for America, apparently, at least for now, they are
actually good for us!
As if that was not
enough good news we also learned that Tariffs have not as of yet caused any
uptick in inflation (https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2025-05-13/us-inflation-comes-in-softer-than-forecast-for-another-month?srnd=homepage-americas). As
a matter of fact, the CPI actually fell to its lowest level in four years,
which would coincide with when Biden’s “Build Inflation Bigger” plan was
launched. Turns out that Trump and his
Tariffs are not only good for the government’s coffers, but also good for
everyday Americans!
Oh, and for those
who were distraught about the stock market “carnage” caused by Trump and his
meandering application of tariffs. There
certainly was considerable churn in the American stock market, but as of this
week all three primary indices of our stock markets returned to positive
territory for the year (https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/aaaaand-its-gone).
Looks like several of the MSM narratives all popped at once like a child’s
bubbles!
Finally, once
again President Trump demonstrates himself to be on the side of those few union
workers left in this country as he begins a tariff assault on foreign
movies/entertainment in an effort to get those jobs back here in the market
they are intended to amuse (https://iatse.net/iatse-on-president-trump-movie-tariff-announcement-u-s-needs-balanced-federal-response-to-return-film-and-tv-jobs/). I
can not explain how Trump’s Tariffs work their magic, but I look forward to
watching more of their effects, as should we all in my humble opinion.
Amen
Please
join us in our recessional on page 3 of your hymnal “O Lord Please Don’t Burn
Us” second verse.
Oh Please don’t lightly poach us, Or Baste us with hot
fat,
Don’t fricassee or roast us, Or boil us in
a vat,
And please don’t stick thy servants, Lord, In a
Rotissomat.
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