The First Week of Pythonalia. Year Seven

 

Welcome to the First week of “Pythonalia”. Year Seven

All are Welcome to rejoice and enjoy our first week of Pythonalia.  Pythonalia is the six week (in honor of the six holy prophets) celebration of our religion's rich history and impact on civilization.  

Please open your Hymnal to page 3 and join in our processional  “O Lord Please Don’t Burn Us” Verse 1

O LORD, please don’t burn us,   Don’t grill or toast your flock,

Don’t put us on the barbecue,  Or simmer us in stock,

Don’t braise or bake or boil us,  Or stir fry us in a wok. 

 

Thank you for that joyful rendition I know the two departed prophets heard and enjoyed your voices raised in praise.  Now please open The Holy Text volume 1 to episode 5 page 60 where the prophets say: 

(We see a young man playing chess with another young man. They are in an ordinary flat. There is a tremendous battering, banging, hammering and clattering at the door.)
Young Man (Eric Idle): Door's open.
Policeman (Graham Chapman): Oh. Yes. (he enters) All right. All right, all right, all right. My name's Police Constable Henry Thatcher, and this is a raid. I have reason to believe that there are certain substances on the premises.
Young Man: Well what sort of substances officer?
Policeman: Er... certain substances.
Young Man: Well, what sort of certain substances?
Policeman: Er, certain substances of an illicit nature.
Young Man: Er, could you be more specific?
Policeman: I beg your pardon? Young Man: Could you be 'clearer'. Policeman: Oh, oh... yes, er... certain substances on the premises to be removed for clinical tests. Young Man: Have you got anything particular in mind? Policeman: Well what have you got?

Please open your hymnal to page 7 and join us in singing “The Ferret Song” Verse 2

I've got a ferret sticking up my nose,  (It starts singing when he wears his formal clothes)

I can almost stand the noise,  But at parties it destroys My hard-earned and carefully cultivated social poise

I've got a ferret sticking up my nose,  (Worst of all it constantly explodes),  Ferrets don't explode you say,  But it happened nine times yesterday
And I should know for each time I was standing in the way,  I've got a ferret sticking up my nose,  (He's got a ferret sticking up his nose)
How it got there I can't tell,  But now it's there it hurts like hell,  And what's more it radically affects my sense of smell 

 

Policeman: (approaching the girls and getting out his notebook) Hang on. You can't park here you know.

Women: (bewildered) We're not parked!

Policeman: No parked! What's that then?

Women: That's our lunch.

Policeman: Right. I'm taking that in for forensic examination.

Women: Why?

Policeman: Because it might have been used as a murder weapon, that's why! (the girls look at each other; the policeman grabs their lunch) Yeah, not bad. Could be worse. (to the reporter) Beer?

Reporter: (desperately) No, no, please ... honestly ... please ...

(The policeman walks off. There is a crash of breaking glass. An alarm bell starts to ring. The reporter winces. The policeman walks into shot again, holding two bottles of beer. He sits down, opens the beers with his teeth and hands one to reporter who is very embarrassed.)

Policeman: Now, the Chaldeans, who used to inhabit the area in between the Tigris and Euphrates rivers, their helmets were of the modular restrained kind of type ...

Homily: Parishioners, A new year and back to the same old grind as “migrants” continue to tear down civilization, mostly in Europe.  The Governments of Europe continue to try and defend their replacement of Europeans with an army of “migrants”, but the reality shows through in their efforts.  In Britain for example it was recently admitted that more than 62,000 people had been arrested for “Hate Speak Crimes” (https://www.zerohedge.com/political/more-62000-arrested-speech-related-offenses-britain-report-finds).  On a simplistic note that is more than 34 people per day on average over the period covered!  On an artistic note, could they have developed a more Orwellian name for the law?  I think not!   

Meanwhile over in Germany, Bavaria to be specific, it turns out that the Migrants are causing more crimes by the day (https://www.zerohedge.com/geopolitical/migrants-responsible-47-all-violent-crime-german-state-bavaria).  According to the German ministry of the interior leaked report, 47% of all violent crimes are committed by “migrants”.  Imagine that reality, basically doubling your violent crime events because of your government deciding to allow in “migrants” who have no respect for the locals or their laws.  I guess that ends the notion of “Peaceful Integration” at least.   

And just this week in France, the other ring leader of the “migrant” invasion of Europe, the now THIRD generation of “migrants” are burning down their schools and rioting across the country (https://www.zerohedge.com/political/france-erupts-chaos-rioting-migrant-kids-torch-schools-and-busses).  You may well ask what are the migrants protesting about, why for more teachers (why would anyone want to be one under the conditions) and of course MORE dedicated spaces in the French university system for “migrants”!  Well, France is up in flames again, but this time it is not the French doing it … yet!  We will see after next year’s election.  With France’s history of violent Revolutions it should be interesting. 

Amen

Please join us in our recessional on page 3 of your hymnal “O Lord Please Don’t Burn Us” second verse. 

Oh Please don’t lightly

poach us,  Or Baste us with hot fat,

Don’t fricassee or roast us,    Or boil us in a vat,

And please don’t stick thy servants, Lord,  In a Rotissomat.