The Tenth Week of Ordinary Time
Welcome to the Tenth week of Ordinary Time.
Please
open your Hymnal to page 3 and join in our processional “O Lord
Please Don’t Burn Us” Verse 1
O LORD, please don’t burn us, Don’t grill or
toast your flock,
Don’t put us on the barbecue, Or simmer us in stock,
Don’t braise or bake or boil us, Or stir fry us in a
wok.
Thank you for
that energizing rendition it filled my soul with vitality for this
service. Now please open The Holy Text volume 1 to episode 20 page
264 where the prophets say …
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Stock film
of fast moving Huns thundering around on horseback. |
|
|
First Voice
Over |
In the fifth
century, as the once-mighty Roman Empire (America) crumbled, the soft
underbelly of Western Europe (Hemisphere) lay invitingly exposed to the
barbarian hordes to the East (and West). Alaric the Visigoth (Bill Clinton),
Galseric the Vandal (George W. Bush) and Theodoric the Ostrogoth (Barack
Obama) in turn swept westward in a reign of (economic) terror. But none
surpassed in power and cruelty the mighty Attila the Hun (Sleepy Uncle Joe). |
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Second Voice
Over |
Ladies and
gentlemen, it's the 'Attila the Hun (Sleepy Uncle Joe) Show '. |
|
Cut to film.
Music plays: 'The Debbie Reynolds Show' theme - 'With a little love, just a
little love'. We see Attila the Hun running towards Mrs Attila the Hun in
slow motion, laughing and smiling. CAPTION:
'THE ATTILA THE HUN SHOW' |
Oliver Cromwell, Lord
Protector of England (Ole)
Born in 1599, died in 1658 (September)
Then he smashed (Ireland), set up the Commonwealth (and more!).
He crushed the Scots at Worcester, and beat the Dutch at sea in 1653, and then
He dissolved the Rump
Parliament,
And with Lambert's consent wrote the instrument of Government
Under which Oliver was Protector at last, The End!
Now please open The Holy Text volume 2 to episode 43 page
307 where the prophets say …
|
Voice Over |
Well they're under starter's orders for this very valuable
Queen Victoria Handicap. And they're off, (the starting stall doors
fly open; out come eight identically dressed Queen Victorias who go bustling
off up the field) and Queen Victoria got a clean jump off, followed
by Queen Victoria, Queen Victoria and Queen Victoria. It's Queen Victoria
from Queen Victoria and Queen Victoria. It's Queen Victoria making the early
running on the inside. And at the back Queen Victoria already a couple of
lengths behind the leaders. Queen Victoria has now moved up to challenge
Queen Victoria with Queen Victoria losing ground. Queen Victoria tucked in
neatly on the stand side with a clear view. Queen Victoria still the back
marker as they approach the halfway mark, but making ground now, suddenly
past Queen Victoria with Queen Victoria, Queen Victoria and Queen Victoria
still well placed as they approach the first fence. (a low angle shot
as the Queen Victorias appear over the fence and thunder towards the camera) And
at the first fence it's Queen Victoria just ahead of Queen Victoria and Queen
Victoria falling away in third place. And Queen Victoria in the lead as they
... |
Homily Parishioners, the unmitigated incompetence of Kalifornia
in the face of the recent wild fires is truly staggering. This incompetence starts at basic
planning. It has recently been revealed
that Eco Nazi’s decided that protecting a rare plant was more important than
clearing brush to avoid wild fires (https://nypost.com/2025/01/14/us-news/california-bureaucrats-halted-pacific-palisades-fire-safety-project-to-save-endangered-shrub/).
Thus, both the brush and the rare plants have been burnt to a crisp, I
do hope the Eco Nazi’s are pleased.
Of course the
incompetence is not limited to the courts and lawyers. For the last two years the LA Fire Department
has been proudly boasting of giving “extra” fire fighting equipment to Ukraine
(https://abc7.com/los-angeles-county-firefighters-sending-supplies-to-ukraine-first-responders/11661534/).
One can not wonder but if LAFD might wish they had that equipment in the
light of their shortages during the recent calamity.
Of course having
the equipment might not have mattered since the firemen ran out of water in the
highlands and the equipment without water is of “limited” use. But this leads to another screaming example
of Kalifornia incompetence. It turns out
that the woman in charge of making sure the water is (not) where it needs to be
earns 750,000$ a year as a government worker (https://www.foxla.com/news/meet-las-highest-paid-new-city-employee-with-a-750000-salary). Perhaps if Kalifornia eliminated the
woman’s job and just shipped THAT money to Ukraine, they might have done better
at dealing with the wild fires.
Finally, in the
most egregious example of Kalifornia incompetence, as LA burns, the Mayor of LA
has flown off to Ghana to “witness” the swearing in of that country’s new
president (https://nypost.com/2025/01/08/us-news/la-residents-rip-mayor-bass-as-wildfire-burns-homes-to-the-ground-youre-useless/). Literally,
as LA burns, Mayor Bass has flown off the continent! And
people wonder how such a thing could happen in the United States?
Amen
Please
join us in our recessional on page 3 of your hymnal “O Lord Please Don’t Burn
Us” second verse.
Oh Please don’t lightly poach us, Or Baste us with hot
fat,
Don’t fricassee or roast us, Or boil us in
a vat,
And please don’t stick thy servants, Lord, In a
Rotissomat.
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