Fourteenth Week of Ordinary Time

 

Welcome to the Fourteenth week of Ordinary Time.

Please open your Hymnal to page 3 and join in our processional  “O Lord Please Don’t Burn Us” Verse 1

O LORD, please don’t burn us,   Don’t grill or toast your flock,

Don’t put us on the barbecue,  Or simmer us in stock,

Don’t braise or bake or boil us,  Or stir fry us in a wok. 

Thank you for that slow rendition as I limped to the pulpit.  Now please open The Holy Text volume 1 to episode 9 page 116 where the prophets say …

(Cut back to Canadian backdrop. In front, a man with a knotted handkerchief on his heed, a woolly pullover, and braces. Superimposed caption on the screen ' PROF. R. J. GUMBY')

Gumby: Well I think TV's killed real entertainment. In the old days we used to make our own fun. At Christmas parties I used to strike myself on the head repeatedly with blunt instruments while crooning. (sings) 'Only make believe, I love you, (hits himself on head with bricks) Only make believe that you love me, (hits himself) Others find peace of mind...'

(Cut to a swish nightclub. Compare enters.)

Open your hymnal to page 26 and join us in singing “I’m So Worried”  Verse 3

I'm so worried about modern technology,  I'm so worried about all the things
That they dump in the sea, I'm so worried about it,  Worried about it, worried, worried, worried

I'm so worried about everything that can go wrong, 
I'm so worried about whether people like this song,
I'm so worried about this very next verse,  It isn't the best that I've got

Now please open The Holy Text volume 2 to episode 32 page 122 where the prophets say …

(Close up on a sign saying 'Harley Street'. Stirring music. Mix through to interior of a smart, plush, ever so expensive Harley Street consulting room. The music swells and fades. Knocking at door, a short pause, then T.F. Gumby enters, backwards.)

T. F. Gumby: Doctor! Doctor! DOCTOR! (he goes up to the antique desk and bangs the bell violently; he smashes the intercom and generally breaks the desk up) Doctor! Doctor! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! Doctor! Doctor! Where is the Doctor?

(A pause. Then another door opens and another Gumby appears.)

Specialist: Hello!

T. F. Gumby: Are you the' brain specialist?

Specialist: Hello!

T. F. Gumby: Are you the brain specialist?

Specialist: No, no, I am not the brain specialist. No, no, I am not... Yes. Yes I am.

T. F. Gumby: My brain hurts!

Specialist: Well let's take a look at it, Mr. Gumby.

(Gumby specialist starts to pull up Gumby's sweater.)

T. F. Gumby: No, no, no, my brain in my head. (specialist thumps him on the head)

Specialist: It will have to come out.

T. F. Gumby: Out? Of my head?

Specialist: Yes! All the bits of it. Nurse! Nurse! (a nurse enters) Nurse, take Mr. Gumby to a brain surgeon.

Homily  Instead of looking at this week’s examples of “Incompetent Uncle Joe” and his administration of shame, I thought we would take a look at an international level of incompetence that can only be brought to us by the U.N. – So I bring you the International persecution of Christians.  An NGO that tracks religious persecution around the world had to expand its list of the top 50 countries for persecution of Christians to a list of the top 70 countries for Christian persecution (https://www.opendoors.org/en-US/persecution/countries/).   Most notably in this list we find that 1 in 5 Christians in Africa are currently being persecuted, and 2 in 5 Christians in Asia are currently being persecuted.  All while the U.N. and Incompetent Uncle Joe do nothing. 

Internationally this persecution receives no attention, after all they are just Christians.  In Europe the Christians seem to be busy trying to toe the Woke/D.E.I. line of thinking in hope of avoiding such treatment in their own countries (https://www.methodist.org.uk/media/31380/ilg-designed-update-december-2023.pdf).   I am sure that referring to your spouse as your “partner” will make their torture at the hands of the Woke/D.E.I. crown so much easier to get over. 

Here in America the nonsense continues, but at least our religious leaders continue to fight against it (https://www.desmoinesregister.com/story/news/crime-and-courts/2024/01/30/iowa-capitol-satanic-statue-vandalism-hate-crime-michael-cassidy-mississippi/72413585007/).  But these Christian fights are now being branded as “Hate Crimes”.  Apparently "the powers that want to be” do not view insulting and denigrating all Christians as a Hate Crime, but smashing those insults and denigrations IS! 

Meanwhile, the fight goes on in the U.S. with people claiming everyone getting a Christian holiday off from work is a form of religious oppression (https://www.chrc-ccdp.gc.ca/en/resources/publications/discussion-paper-religious-intolerance).  Perhaps we should move to a system where people only get those holidays off that are part of whatever they are willing to officially designate themselves as part of. 

Amen

Please join us in our recessional on page 3 of your hymnal “O Lord Please Don’t Burn Us” second verse. 

Oh Please don’t lightly poach us,  Or Baste us with hot fat,

Don’t fricassee or roast us,    Or boil us in a vat,

And please don’t stick thy servants, Lord,  In a Rotissomat.