The Fifteenth Week of Extra Ordinary Time
Welcome to the
Fifteenth Week of Extra Ordinary Time.
Please
open your Hymnal to page 3 and join in our processional “O Lord
Please Don’t Burn Us” Verse 1
O LORD, please don’t burn us, Don’t grill or
toast your flock,
Don’t put us on the barbecue, Or simmer us in stock,
Don’t braise or bake or boil us, Or stir fry us in a wok.
My spirit
rejoices in the Prophets blessings this week, we have achieved another “Good
News” Homily. My soul is as light as a feather.
Now please
open The Holy Text volume 1 to episode 5 page 62 where the prophets
say …
|
Newsreader |
(as if it's
the fourth item)) ... and several butchers aprons. In Fulham this morning a
jeweller's shop was broken into and jewellery to the value of £2,000 stolen.
Police have issued this picture of a man they wish to interview. (on
the screen behind, him, there appears an identical picture of him, sitting at
his newsreader desk) The man is in his late twenties wearing a grey
suit, a white shirt and a floral tie. (on the screen behind, police
come in and remove the newsreader) Will anyone who sees this man or
can give any information about his whereabouts contact their nearest
policestation. (he is handed a piece of paper) Ah! Oh. We've
just heard that police have detained the man they wished to interview in
connection with the jewel robbery. Ah, but after questioning police have
ruled him out of their enquiries and released him. (the other
newsreader appears back on the screen and sits down) Sport. (he
is handed another piece of paper) Ah, they say, however, that acting
on his information they now wish to interview a newsreader in the central
London area. Ah, police are concentrating their enquiries on the British
Broadcasting Corp ... (a policeman comes in, and removes newsreader
in the foreground) Excuse me a minute... |
|
The
newsreader on the screen behind continues. |
|
|
Other
Newsreader |
We
understand a man is now helping police with their enquiries. And that is the
end of the news. (he clips a piece of jewellery on to his ear) And
now, 'Match of the Day'. |
Finland , Finland , Finland, The country where I
want to be
Eating breakfast or dinner, Or snack lunch in the hall
Finland , Finland , Finland, Finland has it all
You're so sadly neglected, And often ignored
A poor second to Belgium, When going abroad
Now please open The Holy Text volume 2 to episode 37 page 196 where the prophets say …
|
Mrs O |
What do the
stars say? |
|
Mrs Trepidatious |
Well, Petula
Clark says burst them early, but David Frost... |
|
Mrs O |
No, the stars in
the paper, you cloth-eared heap of anteater's catarrh, the zodiacal signs,
the horoscopic fates, the astrological portents, the omens, the genethliac
prognostications, the mantalogical harbingers, the vaticinal utterances, the
fatidical premonitory uttering of the mantalogical omens - what do the
bleeding stars in the paper predict, forecast, prophesy, foretell,
prognosticate... |
|
A big sheet
is lowered with the words on. |
|
|
Voice Over |
And this is
where you at home can join in. |
|
Mrs O |
... forebode,
bode, augur, spell, foretoken, (the audience joins in) presage,
portend, foreshow, foreshadow, forerun, herald, point to, betoken, indicate! |
|
Mrs Trepidatious |
I don't know. |
Homily Parishioners,
we have achieved another “Good News” homily!
Let the enjoyment commence. I
will start with a piece of personal “good news”. All of you are aware of my preference for the
real sugar variations of Pepsi products.
Recently President Trump asked Coke to make its product with sugar instead
of corn syrup. This week Coke announced
they are honoring President Trump’s request and will release a sugar soda later
this year (https://www.zerohedge.com/medical/pepsi-exec-floats-switch-sugar-after-trump-coca-cola-announcement). In
response to Coke’s announcement Pepsi announced they will be expanding their
sugar sodas this year.
With “Winnie”
Jinping’s strangle hold on rare earth metals tighter than Winnie the Pooh’s
grip on a Honey pot. An amazing announcement
was made recently. It turns out that
Wyoming has a massive deposit of Rare Earth Metals buried inside (https://www.freightwaves.com/news/massive-rare-earths-elements-deposit-confirmed-in-wyoming?oly_enc_id=7576E4150945E5B).
Looks like we will be able to reduce our dependency on the evil Winnie
as this production goes online.
With spate of air
traffic control mishaps lately it appears that the problem has been located and
is being fixed by the Trump administration.
It turns out that Pete “Buttchich”, the pseudoBiden secretary of transportation
was spending half the yearly budget of the Transportation Department on D.E.I. grants
at the expense of delaying upgrading air traffic controller computers and
electronics (https://nypost.com/2025/07/21/us-news/pete-buttigiegs-dot-spent-80-billion-on-dei-grants-delayed-air-traffic-control-upgrades-records-industry-insiders/?utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter&utm_campaign=nypost).
Needless to say, the Trump Administration has ceased the D.E.I. (or
should that be D.I.E. for the flying public?) funding and restored all the money
to safety and electronics upgrades! I am
confident once the libtard lawsuits are settled and the money actually delivers
the upgraded equipment, flying will return to its former safe standards.
Finally, two other
Trump administration elements have generated some positive news as well. First up, RFK in Health and Human Services
has ended allowing Illegals to access HHS services (https://www.zerohedge.com/political/rfk-jr-bans-illegal-immigrants-government-funded-programs). Thus
reducing the bleeding dry of our welfare system at the expense of our actual citizenry. Meanwhile, Trumps team have managed to reduce
the IRS workforce by 25% (https://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2025/jul/22/trump-slashed-25-irs-workforce/).
This reduction remember is in just over 6 months time! Imagine what can be accomplished in the next
three and a half years.
Amen
Please
join us in our recessional on page 3 of your hymnal “O Lord Please Don’t Burn
Us” second verse.
Oh Please don’t lightly poach us, Or Baste us with hot
fat,
Don’t fricassee or roast us, Or boil us in
a vat,
And please don’t stick thy servants, Lord, In a
Rotissomat.
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